Dirty Limericks are the best kind of limericks and the most popular! Here you will find the nasty and sexual limericks that we can't show on the main page. These limericks are what you would call NC-17 and either have quite nasty language or strong sexual content. But that is why we like um! Remember you can submit your own dirty limericks by clicking in the "Add a Limerick" button in the navigation. Limercks are displayed by the most popular ones first, so make sure to Vote Up your favorites!
On the breast of a whore named Gail,
Was tattooed the price of her tail.
And on her behind,
For the sake of the blind,
Was the same information in Braille.
There was a young girl from Madrass,
That had a magnificent ass.
You probably think,
it was soft and pink,
But was gray, had ears, and ate grass.
If intercourse gives you thrombosis,
While abstinence causes neurosis,
I'd prefer to expire,
Than live on in a state of psychosis.
There once was a man from O'Doole
who discovered red spots on his tool.
He went to the doc,
who looked at his cock,
and said, "wipe off the lipstick, you fool."
A gay Irish Priest in New Delhi
Tattooed the Lord's Prayer on his belly
The the time that a brahman
Got down to the Amen
He'd blown both salvation and Kelley.
An architect fellow named Yoric
can, when he's feeling euphoric,
provide for selection
three types of erection:
Corinthian, Ionic, and Doric.
There once was a girl from Seattle,
Who's hobby was sucking off cattle.
When a bull from the South,
Shot a load in her mouth,
Her tits started to rattle.
There was an old lady from wheeling, she had such a wonderful feeling.
She lay on her back, spread open her crack and came all over the ceiling.
There was a young lady from Lyme
who liked to have sex all the time
so she slept with a tick,
and you might say 'ick'
but she said it is divine
A wanton young lady from Wimley
Reproached for not acting quite primly
Said, "Heavens above!
I know sex ain't love,
But it's such an entrancing facsimile."