Dirty Limericks are the best kind of limericks and the most popular! Here you will find the nasty and sexual limericks that we can't show on the main page. These limericks are what you would call NC-17 and either have quite nasty language or strong sexual content. But that is why we like um! Remember you can submit your own dirty limericks by clicking in the "Add a Limerick" button in the navigation. Limercks are displayed by the most popular ones first, so make sure to Vote Up your favorites!
There was a young women of Cheadle,
Who once gave the clap to a beadle.
Said she, "Does it itch?"
"It does, you damned bitch,
And it burns like hell-fire when I peedle."
There once was a priest from Morocco
Who's motto was really quite macho
He said "To be blunt
God decreed we eat cunt.
Why else would it look like a taco?"
A lady with features cherubic
Was famed for her area pubic.
When they asked her its size
She replied in surprise,
"Are you speaking of square feet, or cubic?"
There once was a fellow named Tommy,
who could deep throat a log of salami.
"It's amazing!" I spoke,
as he said with a choke,
"I first learned this trick from my mommy!"
Have you heard of the unlucky abbott
with a cock that was shaped like a rabbit?
It fit in no one
'til one day a nun
with a cunt like a hutch dropped her habit.
I once knew a man, made me frantic!
His member was super gigantic
He gave it a flip
(it was named for the ship)
"would you like to go down on Titanic?"
There was an old lady from wheeling, she had such a wonderful feeling.
She lay on her back, spread open her crack and came all over the ceiling.
One morning a man named John
Discovered his penis was gone
He looked high & low
And wouldn't you know
It was sunning itself on the lawn.
The sea captain's tender young bride,
Fell into the bay at low tide.
You could tell by her squeal,
That a chance passing eel,
Had discovered a warm place to hide.
There was a young fellow named Lancelot
Whom his neighbors all looked on askance a lot.
Whenever he'd pass
A presentable lass,
The front of his pants would advance a lot.