Dirty Limericks are the best kind of limericks and the most popular! Here you will find the nasty and sexual limericks that we can't show on the main page. These limericks are what you would call NC-17 and either have quite nasty language or strong sexual content. But that is why we like um! Remember you can submit your own dirty limericks by clicking in the "Add a Limerick" button in the navigation. Limercks are displayed by the most popular ones first, so make sure to Vote Up your favorites!
A gay Irish Priest in New Delhi
Tattooed the Lord's Prayer on his belly
The the time that a brahman
Got down to the Amen
He'd blown both salvation and Kelley.
Have you heard of the unlucky abbott
with a cock that was shaped like a rabbit?
It fit in no one
'til one day a nun
with a cunt like a hutch dropped her habit.
I once knew a man, made me frantic!
His member was super gigantic
He gave it a flip
(it was named for the ship)
"would you like to go down on Titanic?"
The sea captain's tender young bride,
Fell into the bay at low tide.
You could tell by her squeal,
That a chance passing eel,
Had discovered a warm place to hide.
A peeker at peckers named Jay,
Hung out at the Y.M.C.A.
But the dick that he saw,
Was Detective McGraw,
Who hauled the piqued peeker away.
On the breast of a whore named Gail,
Was tattooed the price of her tail.
And on her behind,
For the sake of the blind,
Was the same information in Braille.
There was a young women of Cheadle,
Who once gave the clap to a beadle.
Said she, "Does it itch?"
"It does, you damned bitch,
And it burns like hell-fire when I peedle."
There once was a lady from Greeling,
Who claimed to have no sexual feeling.
'Till a fellow named Morris,
Explored her clitoris.
..She had to be scraped off the ceiling!!
There once was a priest from Morocco
Who's motto was really quite macho
He said "To be blunt
God decreed we eat cunt.
Why else would it look like a taco?"
A lady with features cherubic
Was famed for her area pubic.
When they asked her its size
She replied in surprise,
"Are you speaking of square feet, or cubic?"